Back to work......................

For me.

Today I started back to work, although it is only mornings for 2 1/2 weeks, it is still something in the mean time.  I leave the house at 7:45, so that is not to bad and I am home by 1:00 unless I stop to pick up groceries.  I was nervous about starting, and didn't sleep very well last night, so I will get the kids lunches ready before bed and head up early with my book and hopefully get a good nights sleep tonight.  I was hoping that John would have found some sort of work by now, but  he shows no signs of looking or caring about even having a job.  I get that he is taking some time off, but would it kill him to make a few calls, and if not to at least help around the house.  Maybe pick up, or throw a load of laundry in or for goodness sake at the very least TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE when I ask.  I have only been back 1 day, and I am getting frustrated already, this venting on my blog helps, and some people actually read it and totally understand what I mean.  He keeps talking about starting up his own shop again, and I say again, because this happens about every 3 - 5 years, and I am getting sick just thinking about it.  The last time was after his major depression in 2001 and ended with us being forced to file bankruptcy (not a pleasant thing either I might add).  This is something I am scared to death to do again, and it is very difficult to get that information through to him.  It is also a VERY VERY bad time for woodworking shops in general, and a couple of people have told him this but he refuses to listen rationally.  I give him an A for effort, but I don't really want to be taken along for the ride this time around, nor do I want to put my kids through that again.  Colin wasn't even born when the last shop closed, and the girls were 6 years younger, so they don't really know the whole story, but now the girls are older and still don't really understand, which is stressful to them because they will draw their own conclusions, and can't always verbalize what they are feeling, or even realize themselves what they are feeling.  I try to keep an open dialogue with them, but sometimes it is difficult.  Will forge ahead with my chin up  :)

Well got to go dinner is almost ready Teryaki Chicken Stir Fry (yummy).

Thanks for listening to me rant!!!!!

Shelley